r/facepalm Mar 22 '23 Gold 1

Fellas, is it gay to enjoy sex with a woman?? 🇲​🇮​🇸​🇨​

https://i.imgur.com/fq29N8f.jpg

[removed] — view removed post

38.3k Upvotes

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3.8k

u/headbanging_forJesus Mar 22 '23

"A driver don't talk while driving"

Uber drivers kindly disagree

594

u/mightypint Mar 22 '23

Right? Are you telling me this guy never utters a word from the moment his ass hits the drivers seat?

446

u/buffaloraven Mar 22 '23 Take My Energy Rocket Like

Fellas, is it gay to talk while driving?

117

u/Live-Motor-4000 Mar 22 '23

Depends whether you’re backing up

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u/friedwidth Mar 22 '23

I'm wondering why his car is squeaky and squirting... should probably take it in for some maintenance

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u/ZedTheEvilTaco Mar 22 '23

Idk, I've definitely never called my mom while driving just to break the long, awkward silences.

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u/Rook_to_Queen-1 Mar 22 '23

My dude. If you’re having awkward silences with your self, you might need a little bit of therapy, lol.

229

u/ZedTheEvilTaco Mar 22 '23

I don't like quiet.

But I DEFINITELY need therapy.

82

u/Bradddtheimpaler Mar 22 '23

I listen to the people on podcasts I have parasocial relationships with.

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u/Brycekaz Mar 22 '23

This man sits in silence in the car with no music staring angrily at the road

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u/Seisme1138 Mar 22 '23 All-Seeing Upvote Press F Giggle Masterpiece Evil Cackle

The car's faking.

1.8k

u/gmachine19 Mar 22 '23

I fucking knew it! I bet my car just wanted to see another mechanic!

408

u/MaikThoma Mar 22 '23

He just has a car jack that makes you feel different things

77

u/FlametopFred Mar 22 '23

put your car upon the lift and start with a lube job then rotate your tires and get that fluid flowing

31

u/NobleSentiments Mar 22 '23

And I’m sure that’s where it started. The car’s excuse is that the other man knew when to change the oil

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u/sheezy520 Mar 22 '23

Fucking cars! They’ll always go for the mechanics with the biggest wrenches.

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u/DigitalUnlimited Mar 22 '23

A quick lube technician approves this comment.

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u/StillSundayDrunk Mar 22 '23

Plus, that squirting he's talking about is basically just blinker fluid.

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u/TarryBuckwell Mar 22 '23

This tweet was written by a dude who does not have his driver’s license yet but has mimed racing his parents’ car in the garage

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u/HalcyonDreams36 Mar 22 '23

And has the equivalent experience with sex, I'd hazard.

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u/gypsycookie1015 Mar 22 '23

That's cuz he's not talking to it while he drives it! Gotta be in tune

(In what world is that a good example? As if nobody talks while driving. Absurd.)

141

u/That_guy_who_posted Mar 22 '23

My car doesn't get anywhere without me giving it a near-constant stream of "c'mon, it's only a little hill, there you go, you can do it, fuck yeah we made it, phew" etc.

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u/I_main_pyro Mar 22 '23

Effeminate and pathetic. You need to conquer and dominate your car.

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u/Feanoro_ Mar 22 '23

I talk in my car even if I’m alone. Mostly it’s singing along to my Spotify playlist, sometimes cursing at an idiot on the road. I rarely talk to my car though.

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u/AZSnake Mar 22 '23

And broken, if it's squirting anything.

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u/Life-Meal6635 Mar 22 '23

I mean for me, I enjoy sex where both he and I are both moaning, end up broken and then squirt stuff. That sounds great.

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u/saladtosser88 Mar 22 '23

lmfaooo as a car guy this is hilarious cause it common for noises and shit to be random or come and go depending on temperature etc etc

60

u/Elitepikachu Mar 22 '23

Oh you know all those noises come and go depending on the temperature and mood.....

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u/Substantial_Tap_2493 Mar 22 '23

When I'm driving, I'm generally weaving a fine tapestry of filthy insults for all the mouth-breathing drivers around me. I guarantee I make more noise than the car.

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u/Lulalula8 Mar 22 '23

This. There is no shortage of mouth breathing idiots that somehow lost their turn with the brain cell forever.

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u/[deleted] Mar 22 '23

[deleted]

3.9k

u/DeathStarVet Mar 22 '23 Silver

This is the kind of guy who doesn't wash his asshole because it's too "gay".

1.9k

u/Pooglio17 Mar 22 '23 Take My Energy

Real men live in constant pain from being trapped inside the body of the man, which is so so gay.

407

u/Lacaud Mar 22 '23

Men are trapped inside a man suit!

186

u/[deleted] Mar 22 '23

[removed] — view removed comment

248

u/darthkotya Mar 22 '23

A miserable little pile of secrets!

119

u/[deleted] Mar 22 '23

BUT ENOUGH TALK, HAVE AT YOU

79

u/Gerudo_King Mar 22 '23

Wine glass shatters

23

u/trekdudebro Mar 22 '23

WHAT!?

Updoot for all’s youse. Time for a little SotN

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u/Hello_Destiny Mar 22 '23

A featherless bipedal according to some

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u/Bessalodon Mar 22 '23

BEHOLD A MAN!!

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u/redditstealth Mar 22 '23

A man inside a man is, well, gay.

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u/mua-dweeb Mar 22 '23 Coin Gift

I highly recommend “The Man inside Me” by Dr. Tobias Fünke. A gripping journey to truth and discovery. This man is a genius. As both a behavioral analyst and therapist he’s the countries leading analrapist.

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u/myaltduh Mar 22 '23 edited Mar 22 '23

The only truly straight thing to do is transition, otherwise there will always be a guy in your bed when having sex.

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u/Redxluckyxcharms Mar 22 '23

Come on now. Everyone knows you got to stick a finger in and swirl it around with some soap to make it nice and tidy. Oh. Just me?

108

u/BenSolace Mar 22 '23

Thanks, I read that just as I was licking a piece of wayward peanut butter off my thumb.

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u/Fantastic_Fox4948 Mar 22 '23

Be very careful that you don’t confuse your finger with the poop knife.

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u/xXdeathBY2Xx Mar 22 '23

And I had finally forgotten...

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u/ChiefKrunchy Mar 22 '23

Let's not put on airs in public.....we all know you just lick your finger while brushing your teeth and multitask.

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u/TouchedByAUncle Mar 22 '23

Like the founder of proud boys putting a dildo in his ass to prove he's not gay....

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u/ilongforyesterday Mar 22 '23

Probably doesn’t wipe either. And calls any guy who shows any emotions besides anger a fairy

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u/UniqueFlavors Mar 22 '23

I know a guy who thinks touching his own dick while masturbating is gay.

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u/DragoonDM Mar 22 '23

I wonder what he does when he pees. Obviously he can't sit down to pee, because that would be feminine and gay, but he also couldn't hold it to aim.

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u/jedberg Mar 22 '23

I have questions. Like logistics. I need to know how this works. Does he just hump a pillow? I've only ever seen women hump pillows in porn, does that make it gay?

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u/SipthatTing Mar 22 '23

Yeah this is about the most insecure shit i've ever heard.

218

u/gravetinder Mar 22 '23

Not just insecure, but kinda terrifying. A woman is nothing more than an object of sexual conquest to him. Her status as a human being goes out the window.

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u/ComputerStrong9244 Mar 22 '23 edited Mar 22 '23

To be fair I don't think these types of guys get their wieners touched real often, and the ones that do only run their mouths about being TOTAL ALPHA DOGS online and would dribble pee if their girl saw their post and said "What the fuck is this, Caleb? You calling me your 'slam pig' with your shitty little internet buddies?"

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u/Basic_Bichette Mar 22 '23

Sure they do. They're rapists, and this bullshit is their excuse.

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u/Sithlourde666 Mar 22 '23

There's no element of Love with these types of dudes. Like they may fuck women use them as objects but they don't show an ounce of love and it seems these types of men end up coming out as Gay later on. I also think a lot of these dudes may have been cheated on or whatever and try to validate not showing emotion to women because they're afraid of being hurt again.

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u/Gloomy_Industry8841 Mar 22 '23

That’s what I was thinking. She’s the equivalent to a car in that freak’s scenario. So the guy only views women as objects, not human beings.

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u/Nai-Oxi-Isos-DenXero Mar 22 '23

She’s the equivalent to a car in that freak’s scenario.

I would say that it's even worse than that. A car is an object that can at least be enjoyed, whereas he's too fucking insecure to even allow himself to actually enjoy the sex part of it.

The best part of sex is just letting go and losing yourself in pure hedonistic enjoyment of each other, this uptight ass-clown is probably jackhammering away thinking "gotta look tough, don't make noise, be macho".

It's pathetic and sad.

14

u/radicalelation Mar 22 '23

A healthy couple strives to squeak together.

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u/Lacaud Mar 22 '23

As someone posted above, a girl spoke about her ex-bf and how he refused to wipe his ass because he considered it gay.

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u/SipthatTing Mar 22 '23

u fkin wot m8?!

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u/perkyblondechick Mar 22 '23

Yes! She figured it out when he kept leaving skidmarks ON THE BEDSHEETS.

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u/PositiveAgent2377 Mar 22 '23

That is disgusting.

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u/Internauta29 Mar 22 '23

Whenever these people utter anything related to "being a man" I always read "being an insecure kid that wants people to think he's a full-blown man by awkwardly trying to project confidence (which he doesn't have)"

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u/[deleted] Mar 22 '23

[deleted]

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u/jimmyvcard Mar 22 '23

I mean that’s so common with these new masculinity trends like Tate. It’s just insecurity at the HIGHEST level and they can’t see it. I was a 19 year old boy once so I sort of get it. At 35 it makes me sort of sad.

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u/[deleted] Mar 22 '23

[deleted]

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u/Educational-Dirto Mar 22 '23

It's so sad that the victims of this kind of content are mostly teens and young adults. Did you have similar bad influences when you were 19? Since you turned out fine, if you did have this kind of content back then, we can hope that the victims have some hope for the future too. If not this is very worrying.

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u/cm64 Mar 22 '23

Yes. I'd point to Maddox and Tucker Max for my mid2000s toxic masculinity influencers. I did grow up eventually.

I didn't have algorithms pushing me back to them on every platform though. I just... stopped visiting their websites.

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u/Waste_Advantage Mar 22 '23

He obvs can’t even do car maintenance if his vehicles squeak and squirt.

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u/BurgerMcKinley Mar 22 '23

It’s because they’re trying to mimic characters like Conan.

They forget that Conan watched his whole village get slaughtered, including his mom and dad, and then was sold into slavery, and then became a pit fighter.

You think a guy like that moans and kisses during sex? Lol no. His last moment of happiness was right before him mom was murdered in front of him.

That’s the kind of life and mentality you want? Lol, no thanks. I’m good not being perpetually mentally tortured.

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u/a_reply_to_a_post Mar 22 '23

then his late night show got cancelled...

fuck jay Leno

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u/[deleted] Mar 22 '23

[deleted]

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u/Front_Plankton_6808 Mar 22 '23

Right! As a woman I think it’s weird, and makes me feel insecure as a partner, if a guy is silent. Also, give me some freaking dirty talk! It’s sex, you’re not a monk who’s taken a vow of silence.

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u/DerSturmbannfuror Mar 22 '23

Y would I want to imagine being Andrew Tate??

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u/jackfaire Mar 22 '23

I mean my dude if you're not enjoying the sex you might not like women.

438

u/NikiPlayzzz Mar 22 '23

bro played the uno reverse card i and love it

16

u/Horskr Mar 22 '23

It's funny just maybe 2 days ago there was a post on r/all (I forget the original sub) of a tweet from a girl saying it's so weird when guys are silent during sex lol.

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u/majormimi Mar 22 '23

This is so true, it feels like you’re being fucked by someone who’s dead inside.

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u/Burntfm Mar 22 '23

The takeaway from this is that he likes to have sex with cars.

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u/redditstealth Mar 22 '23

Learn to read you idiot! It says Volvo...

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u/kungpowgoat 'MURICA Mar 22 '23 edited Mar 22 '23

Friend of mine was was with his girlfriend in the next room. He was moaning waaay louder than his girl and we just found it so freaking hilarious. He sounded like one of those rough JAV women but with a deeper masculine voice. They’ve now been married for 20 years so yes. Women love when their partner shows real enjoyment.

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u/redditstealth Mar 22 '23

My wife loves when I get loud. It tells her she's grinding that meat right.

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u/interprime Mar 22 '23

You say that like the guy who wrote this has actually had sex.

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u/[deleted] Mar 22 '23

Poor guys who believe this shit. If anyone I have sex with is completely quiet I would be freaked out. Literally a reason for me to make up an excuse and leave asap.

1.1k

u/Smarmy_Nach Mar 22 '23

It’s quiet until the end when he lets out a “brooooooooooo……….”

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u/TinyWickedOrange Mar 22 '23

stays silent the whole time

"gg wp"

doesn't elaborate

leaves

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u/vaifen Mar 22 '23

I'm hard stuck in bronze competitive sex, please help 😭.

52

u/Coppatop Mar 22 '23

You gotta watch your replays and analyze where things went wrong to climb rank.

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u/mrarthursimon Mar 22 '23

Communicate with your opponent and see what their suggestions for you to improve your play.

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u/Latter-Muffin3925 Mar 22 '23

Bro, you hit bronze?? Can't even find matchmaking for my ten ranked matches.

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u/AFestiveShiving Mar 22 '23

Me and my partner now say this after and do an elaborate fist bump... I don't even remember how it started 😂

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u/newagereject Mar 22 '23

Or you hear over the intercom, 6.8, 7.5, and from the Russian judge 3.5

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u/jointheredditarmy Mar 22 '23

Was doing great but just couldn’t stick the landing. In Russia it’s customary to stay silent until the cigarette is lit

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u/thenletskeepdancing Mar 22 '23

It's so sexy to hear one's partner moan with pleasure. Too bad if being quiet is supposed to be something men do.

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u/RustedAxe88 Mar 22 '23

As a man, I am very vocal during sex. I'm enjoying it and show it.

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u/Vanishingf0x Mar 22 '23

Honestly men being vocal is a huge turn on for most women too. I’m not sure why OOP got this opinion besides someone teasing or making fun of him for any sounds he made. It’s kinda sad actually.

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u/Enlargedtooth Mar 22 '23

As a woman, any type of vocals men make during sex turns me on more than any move he can make 😭 I literally look for porn where the men aren’t silent too. Idk I just love it

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u/sthenri_canalposting Mar 22 '23

There's your problem. The screenshot OP not only doesn't care if his partner enjoys it, he seems to be actively making that less likely. The car analogy speaks volumes: a driver doesn't care if the car enjoys driving. It's not even on their mind.

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u/KayleighJK Mar 22 '23

Me too girl, me too.

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u/Cassiolita Mar 22 '23

Agreed, moaning men is really missing from straight porn.

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u/RustedAxe88 Mar 22 '23

Not to TMI, but I once had a women tell me she loved hearing me swear when she gave me oral, so that tracks lol.

And I mean, I assume like me, women like knowing that their partner is feeling good during the act.

I just can't imagine being stoic.

52

u/Vanishingf0x Mar 22 '23

100% I’d think if I was getting no reaction something was wrong

14

u/IzarkKiaTarj Mar 22 '23

Can confirm, hated giving my ex blowjobs because he just never made any noise and it made me feel insecure.

I mean, I also hated it because he was kinda big and it hurt my jaw, but that didn't affect me emotionally.

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u/Icy-Calligrapher-253 Mar 22 '23

Me personally, I yodel like Tarzan at the appropriate moment, cuz I'm a man!

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u/SilverDem0n Mar 22 '23

So this is why the guys sneak out of my house when I am in bed dressed up as Marcel Marceau?

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u/Minegar Mar 22 '23

I'm sure two French mimes get loud during sex too.

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u/WeeQuiche Mar 22 '23

I never thought it was weird to make noise during sex. It's something that just happens.

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u/[deleted] Mar 22 '23

Yes being completely quiet is weird lol

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u/JackeTuffTuff Mar 22 '23

Instructions unclear: moans while driving

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u/dmnhntr86 Mar 22 '23

I had to stop doing that, just about got my Uber account suspended.

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u/YUNoSignin Mar 22 '23

Being a man is gay. You look at other men. Case closed.

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u/Erik_Dagr Mar 22 '23

Damn mirror! It be makin me gay!

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u/Thebaldsasquatch Mar 22 '23

Especially when you brush your teeth. Moving that thing around in there, watching yourself do it.

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u/XcunningXlinguistX Mar 22 '23

Brushing your tongue just so you can gag. So gay.

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u/Thebaldsasquatch Mar 22 '23

Making eye contact the whole time. Then spitting out the white stuff. You know you want to swallow it.

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u/Altaris2000 Mar 22 '23

You are a man, and just went to the bathroom? Congrats, you just touched a dick and are now gay.

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u/BigBadBen91x Mar 22 '23

I don’t like girls because girls like dick, and that’s gay as fuck

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u/[deleted] Mar 22 '23

lol how sad is it that people live like this? So fragile, but trying to pass it off as being tough. For simply wanting to enjoy sex.

I moaned so loud once, my wife and I literally laughed out loud mid finish. It was one of those times where it just felt so strong for one reason or another, I couldn't even stop it. We still laugh about it together. I feel bad for people who can't let go and just enjoy themselves. Especially in the bedroom.

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u/chrisapplewhite Mar 22 '23 edited Mar 22 '23 Silver Platinum Wholesome All-Seeing Upvote

Very few people actually live like this. More and more people are capitalizing on the ubiquitous, relentless bullshit machine that is social media to become rich and famous like Andrew Tate.

That raw meat guy took steroids. Tate runs a cam girl farm with various levels of consent. Jordan Peterson is a drug addict.

None of these people are real. They are all doing and saying whatever it takes to earn attention and money. The reality is we DO have a masculinity problem in this country, but it's not a lack of it. It's an utter confusion as to what it means, and the now-global communities of peer pressure filling in the blanks in young men's heads.

I work with college aged males. The bullshit they believe in unreal. I didn't know jackshit when I was 19, nobody does. But I also didn't have a 24/7 stream of assholes shouting into my ear about what I should be, either.

Social media is a disease, never forget that.

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u/nutmegtell Mar 22 '23

I’m always thankful I met and married my partner before smart phones, text or especially social media. We barely had email lol. I’d be a basket of nerves.

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u/Synigm4 Mar 22 '23

So let me see if I got this straight:

man + man = gay

man + woman = not manly enough = gay

138

u/omeyz Mar 22 '23

So let me see if I got this straight:

No. You got it gay.

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u/catdog7676 Mar 22 '23

My wife has made me effeminate af then.

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u/thepottsy Mar 22 '23

Tell me you’ve never had sex, without saying you’ve never had sex.

I’ll never understand the people who post shit like this, just flat out outing themselves.

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u/satans_toast Mar 22 '23

I'm not sure he's even owned a car

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u/AtlasMukbanged Mar 22 '23

Or a girlfriend, since we're akin to old vehicles.

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u/EvolvedA Mar 22 '23

"he probably licks the perineum too"

lol WTF, what an idiot...

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u/pankaces Mar 22 '23

He can't even say "eating ass" which says more than enough about his masculinity

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u/thepottsy Mar 22 '23

I wasn't sure where that comment came from, or what the hell it was supposed to even prove.

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u/No_Dragonfly_1894 Mar 22 '23

It feels like a bag of sand

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u/Traditional-Leader54 Mar 22 '23

Or at least never had good sex.

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u/TurtleToast2 Mar 22 '23

Silent men in the bedroom is very unsettling to me. You can't just leave me alone with my thoughts while I'm naked.

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u/Massive-Lime7193 Mar 22 '23

Yeah fuck that , we’re gettin “weird “ and we’re gonna do it together so we can chuckle about it when we are cuddling after. People are too uptight , its sex, it’s supposed to a fun bonding experience not some chore

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u/Minimum_Thanks_99 Mar 22 '23

All jokes aside, toxic masculinity literally takes EVERYTHING from these men. Here is a list of things I have now been told are feminine:

Fatherhood

Brotherhood

Loving my wife

Enjoying sex with my wife

Loving my family

Spending personal time with my family

Holding my baby

Waking up to comfort and protect my baby in the night

Any drink that isn’t beer

Any hobby that isn’t violent

Reading

Writing

Public Speaking

And of course, any expression of joy or compassion with a stranger.

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST WHAT’S LEFT?!? What a horrible, wretched existence. Is there a wonder these men represent the lions share of suicides in developed nations?

There’s NOTHING left. In the pursuit of manliness, they have both expunged everything real masculinity is about, and robbed themselves of any happiness, vulnerability, and comfort.

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u/MadamePooterfly Mar 22 '23

You should just be watching boxing and yelling at the moon. Rage sleep for 8 hours, do it again.

But in all seriousness, this is really sad. The men who buy into this line of thinking will miss out on some of the most special parts of the human experience. I’m glad my husband can enjoy this life with me.

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u/rqnadi Mar 22 '23

Yes and then die of a rage induced heart attack at age 40… just like it should be…

/s

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u/Vocorus Mar 22 '23 edited Mar 22 '23

Can we add "eating lettuce" to your list?

Was told once that real men only eat meat; lettuce and other non-meats are for rabbits or women.

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u/Cheese464 Mar 22 '23

You can add “eating appetizers or dessert” to your list. There was a Tweet from one of those toxic masculinity women on here the other day saying that ordering those was a woman thing.

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u/FROST0099 Mar 22 '23 edited Mar 22 '23

If your vehicle is squeaking and squirting then you're not taking care of it

Edit: Jesus Christ, I didn't expect this comment to explode! Thanks for all the upvotes. When I saw the notification bell on my phone I was worried I offended someone.

559

u/USAIsAUcountry Mar 22 '23

Are you not keeping up? Because caregiving is for women and therefor it's gay to take care of your car.

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u/[deleted] Mar 22 '23

I think you just have to beat the car into submission.

135

u/dont-fear-thereefer Mar 22 '23

And blame it for not taking care of itself

75

u/amBoringGuy Mar 22 '23

“Licks the perineum”? What if I lick the butthole? Does that make me gay?

49

u/SecretPrinciple8708 Mar 22 '23

What if you lick your own butthole? We need answers.

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u/Parody101 Mar 22 '23 All-Seeing Upvote

I think that makes you a cat

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u/amBoringGuy Mar 22 '23

That makes you talented

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u/Shadyschoolgirl Mar 22 '23

Well, you see, buttholes are male anatomy, because all men have buttholes. So if you lick a woman’s butthole, you are DEFINITELY gay, because you’re basically licking a man’s butthole. Hope this helps! /s

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u/choochoopants Mar 22 '23

You were all nice and shiny when I brought you home from the dealership, but you’ve really let yourself go since then.

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u/Ticklerstink Mar 22 '23

I slam my gas pedal down in the dead of winter without letting that poor thing warm up. When I park it to give it a rest its drips all over the ground soaking it in its sweet black juices. Fair to say, I am a real man 💪

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u/ShastaFern99 Mar 22 '23

Conquer and dominate the engine

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u/DrunkenlySober Mar 22 '23

Cars are for fucking and driving. As my dad always used to say, “if you ain’t in the driver seat or tail pipe, kiss that lil bih good night”

Haven’t been gay since which is crazy cause I regularly blow my homie

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u/FoxyInTheSnow Mar 22 '23

Bathing is effeminate, and if you wipe your bottom you are a mincing gay man.

Real women are not repelled by skid marks and dried poo all over a fellah’s bottom, upper, inner thighs, and beyond! A proper womanly woman squeals with delight at such a pungent display of strong, silent manliness.

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u/National-Fig-414 Mar 22 '23

Yeah this person hasn’t been to driving school

Or health class for that matter…

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u/ZakStorm Mar 22 '23

Ok ignoring the toxic masculinity for a second, that hashtag is really pissing me off.

There’s an entire fucking day that starts with m, and it’s fucking called Monday. All you had to do is wait for the weekend to be over, then boom you can have a little alliteration in your life, but no! You just couldn’t wait a few days, you had to admit to the world that sex with you is as spicy and pita bread,didn’t you?

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u/SnooEpiphanies6051 Mar 22 '23

Pita bread is way spicier than that dude’s 5 second “domination” of “women”

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u/If_you_have_Ghost Mar 22 '23

Who the hell can cum in silence?

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u/-byb- Mar 22 '23

anyone that's ever had to be sneaky about it

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u/kacheow Mar 22 '23

Fr when me and my girl are at her parents we do it on the floor (the bed is creaky as hell). Like we’re both adults, but like, you don’t wanna hear ur parents doing it you don’t want them to hear you it’s ugh

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u/PaLiaRoTH Mar 22 '23

Everytime I cum, it sounds like a gunshot.

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u/yeahwellokay Mar 22 '23

Is it more llike a kapow or a pew pew pew?

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u/PaLiaRoTH Mar 22 '23

Depends on the pressure before release.

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u/satans_toast Mar 22 '23

I suspect he has lots of the sex.

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u/jokk- Mar 22 '23

I'm not a pro but I'm pretty sure all the woman who made me moans liked that I did it.

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u/Ebreezyxoxo Mar 22 '23

They did!!!

14

u/LordyItsMuellerTime Mar 22 '23

Silent guys are the worst, like, are you even enjoying being here? Should we just stop?

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u/Randobon Mar 22 '23

Who likes that kind of post…

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u/OsamabinBBQ Mar 22 '23

I don't know why this seems relevant but it does: there is this couple that makes pegging porn and the guy getting fucked is always stone silent, the woman doing the fucking is always wailing and moaning like she's getting plowed like a corn field. Every single time I see one of their videos it invariably becomes so confusing that I have to stop watching...

....So anyways....I have no idea how that fits into all of this but I feel like it does for some reason...

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u/zedazeni Mar 22 '23

It’s gay to be a man since you’re in constant contact with a dick and butthole

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u/SLIP411 Mar 22 '23

The fact that he used the word perineum instead of taint tells me this guy only gets sex from anatomy books. I had to look perineum up to know what it means

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u/Danimaldodo Mar 22 '23

I knew what it meant but I was not aware that giving it a lil lick is not masculine. 🙃

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u/SLIP411 Mar 22 '23

It's funny, cause thinking about it and I'm like ew that's gross, but when the blood gets pumping, it's all fair game

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u/k8t13 Mar 22 '23

the blood doesn't even need to be pumping to be down to lick anywhere a woman wants

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u/SoylentGrunt Mar 22 '23

If your car squeaks and squirts while driving you got problems.

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u/Glum_Hamster_1076 Mar 22 '23

I think someone should let him know sitting in a car doesn’t mean having sex with it.

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u/Dean-The-Mean Mar 22 '23

As a fellow haver of a great many amounts of sex, yes I can confirm this man’s words are 100% factual and not to be questioned.

-best sex society 2023 ©️

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u/EWC_2015 Mar 22 '23

The phrase "conquer and dominate her" is a huge incel red flag. This guy hates women.

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u/JewelerHour3344 Mar 22 '23

If my vehicle is squeaking and squirting, it won’t pass inspection. If you are comparing a woman to a car, chances are you won’t pass inspection either.

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u/Magic_Man_Boobs Mar 22 '23

The idea of having sex with anyone who just remains completely silent sounds awful. I need some feedback noises. Also this goes for everyone, stop faking noises. If you moan when we hit a certain angle like it's the best thing ever I'm gonna be trying to replicate that angle.

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u/ATHFFrylock Mar 22 '23

I surely do lick the Perineum.

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u/69-is-my-number Mar 22 '23

I would happily lick my wife’s perineum until my tongue went numb and I forgot what day of the week it was.

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u/TransgenderAvengerZi Mar 22 '23

Yikes, some men are truly terrible at sex.. 😳

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u/almondyeyes Mar 22 '23

I like to make my man moan for me, I think it’s sexy af.

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u/DerPicasso Mar 22 '23

What a sad life

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u/EffectiveSwan8918 Mar 22 '23

Your car shouldn't do that

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u/Specific_Ad_726 Mar 22 '23

Many girls are actually turned on by men making noise… so gentlemen keep doing what you’re doing lol

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u/misplacedsidekick Mar 22 '23

These guys that try to set their own personal mysoginistic philosophies as some weak-ass rule for masculinity crack me up.

They want to be leaders of other men but come off as dumb fucks.

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u/CysaDamerc Mar 22 '23

This guy has never fucked anything not made from silicone.

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u/ausgmr Mar 22 '23

The incel is strong in that one

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u/HoodedSole Mar 22 '23

When my man moans, it makes me cum faster….

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